Do you ever feel like quitting?
Have you ever thought of giving up during a difficult phase?
Like giving up because of a significant setback?
What helped you keep going?
I can tell you I’ve certainly felt that way – many times.
But in almost every situation, I was able to get back on my feet and keep going.
In this article, I’ll tell you a quick story.
I’ll tell you the one thing that stopped me from giving up at a time I thought I was a total loser.
And, at the end of this article, I will share five things I do that help me keep going when everything seems to be going wrong.
The Day I Felt Like a Total Loser
This story goes back to a day I was just 14 years old, and the carnival, this big event I had been looking forward to all year, had finally come to town.
I was excited!
I had worked hard doing odd jobs around the house, mowing the lawn, cleaning out the garage, and whatever else I could manage, and managed to earn five dollars.
It was all the money I had, and I went to the carnival with one mission in mind: win a big stuffed animal for my mom!
I was determined.
So I start playing all those carnival games – you know the ones – the ring toss, basketball shots, the games that look easy… but never are.
And after a couple of hours, I had lost all my money.
I spent every single dollar.
And I didn’t win a single thing. Not even a small prize.
I was bummed out, frustrated, and honestly? I felt like a complete failure.
As I was walking home, head down, my arms lifelessly drooping at my sides, completely defeated, I passed through one last booth.
They were selling patches for 25 cents.
And I had exactly one quarter left in my pocket.
So I looked up and I saw this patch that said “BORN TO LOSE,” and I thought,
“That’s exactly how I feel right now.”
So I bought it.
When I got home, I showed my mom the patch.
I told her,
“Mom, I lost all my money. Those games were a rip-off. I couldn’t win anything. I’m a loser.”
She looked at that patch, grabbed it right out of my hand, and immediately threw it straight into the garbage can.
Then she looked me dead in the eyes and said,
“You are NOT a loser. You are born for greatness. Don’t you ever let me hear you say that about yourself again.“
What she said brought me back to the reality of it all.
Because here’s the crazy part:
I was an A student at school. I was one of the best athletes. And I excelled at anything I put my mind to. But in that moment, because of some silly carnival games, I had let one bad day make me believe I was “born to lose.”
Right then and there, I made a decision.
I decided I was a winner.
I decided I was going to be great at whatever I chose to do.
I decided that I would never let small losses or setbacks change my mind.
And that’s what happened.
By the time I graduated high school, I was:
- A varsity athlete
- An All-League linebacker
- Student council president
- And I graduated with honors.
All because of a mindset shift that started with a patch in the garbage.
And, at 17, I chose to join the Navy and applied to the U.S. Naval Academy at Annapolis to become a Nuclear Engineer.
Only 1,000 students are accepted every year from over 20,000 applicants
But I knew I would be accepted.
I didn’t back down.
I was accepted, and I graduated with honors!
The Simple Take Away
We all hit walls.
We all want to quit sometimes.
That’s just life.
It tests you, it challenges you, and it makes you prove you want what you’re after.
But here’s what you have to remember:
It’s not the setbacks that matter.
It’s the decision you make after it.
Behind every setback and every challenge, there is a lesson, something to be learned that makes you stronger and capable of stepping onto the next step that eventually leads to your goal.
And if you’re facing something hard right now…
As promised, here are five things you can do – five things that I often do – to keep moving forward, no matter how bad it feels in the moment.
1. Shrink the Battle
“Don’t try to conquer the mountain—just take one step.”
Overwhelm is the enemy of progress.
When you look too far ahead, the journey feels impossible.
But all big goals are achieved through achieving many little goals.
So don’t give up just yet.
Zoom in.
Focus on the next five minutes. The next task. The next breath. The next goal.
Significant victories are built on small wins stacked over time.
2. Say It Out Loud
“I’m struggling, but I’m not quitting.”
Your mindset and your words, the things you tell yourself, shape your actions and reality.
When you declare your intention to keep going, especially out loud, you start to believe it.
Tell yourself it as often as you need to.
If you don’t give up, you are going to make it!
Speak strength into your life, even when it feels like pretending.
Say it in the mirror.
In the car.
On your walk.
“I’m still in this. I’m not done yet. I am going to make it!”
Say it until it becomes real.
3. Write a Letter to Your Future Self
“Remind yourself who you’re becoming.”
This one’s powerful.
When you’re at your breaking point, pause and write.
Write a letter to the future you.
The version of you who didn’t quit.
Tell them how proud you are.
Describe the life they’re living now.
The joy they feel. The peace. The purpose. The success.
Then fold it up.
And when life gets hard again…
Read it.
Let your future self pull you through.
And once you finally make it, frame that letter as a reminder that you made it through it all and achieved your goal!
4. Move Your Body
“Motion shifts emotion.”
Your mind is wired to follow your body.
When you’re stuck mentally, get moving physically.
You could go to the gym or a fitness class, but just remember, it doesn’t have to be intense.
Walk.
Stretch.
Do pushups.
Dance in your kitchen.
Just move.
You’ll be amazed at how much clearer everything feels after 10 minutes of movement.
5. Reconnect With Your Why
“Why did you start this in the first place?”
Every hard journey starts with a reason. Some kind of purpose.
Freedom.
Family.
Faith.
Purpose.
Redemption.
Love.
Legacy.
Whatever your “why” is, it still matters.
And sometimes, all it takes to keep going is to feel that reason again.
Write it down.
Say it.
Let it remind you who you are and where you’re headed.
Final Thoughts: You Weren’t Born to Lose
That patch said “Born to Lose.”
But my mom saw the truth:
We are all born for something greater.
The only thing standing between you and your next breakthrough is the decision to keep going.
So don’t give up just because it’s hard.
Rest if you need to.
Cry if you have to.
But don’t you dare quit.
Your story isn’t over.
Not yet.
You’re one decision away from becoming the person you were always meant to be.
And until then, you have all my support.
Love,
Jim