Build Self-Confidence: Compare Yourself to You

Build Self-Confidence

Social Media Influencers Hire Fake Private Jets to Fain Followers

Before I jump into how comparing yourself to “you” can help you build self-confidence, I want to start with a short story that perfectly exemplifies a day-to-day confidence killer.

Picture yourself scrolling through your social media feed, and suddenly, you feel that feeling of inadequacy creeping back up on you. It is an all too common occurrence in a world where social media seems to be full of millionaires and people showing off their massive monthly income, only to leave you feeling unsuccessful. 

You don’t see the complete picture when you compare yourself to someone else. People rarely showcase their hardships and faults. They often share their success and many times even exaggerate it or straight out fake it.

Last week, I read an article that explains how social media influencers rented a fake private jet for an hour to gain followers. The report not only proves that people innate want to seem desirable to others on social media or in life, but it also proves the power of wealth and success over people. As a side note, I happen to know that one of the social media influencers didn’t have a job and had to borrow the $64 for the “one-hour jet” from his dad. 

While the article was interesting, people’s apparent success isn’t limited to renting a fake private jet.  People will go to any length to seem successful. 

So, before you start comparing yourself to others only to feel inadequate… think again. Because the only accurate measure of your success is yourself. 

Comparing Yourself to You

In a world filled with social media, competition, and a constant influx of information, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others. The comparisons can often lead to inadequacy, self-doubt, and even anxiety. While having mentors and role models for guidance and inspiration is essential, measuring your progress against others can hinder your personal growth. In this article, we’ll explore the importance of comparing yourself to yourself, not others, and how this shift in perspective can boost self-confidence and success.

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The Pitfalls of Comparing to Others

You Are Unique
One of the fundamental reasons to stop comparing yourself to others is that you are unique. Your background, experiences, strengths, weaknesses, and aspirations are yours. Comparing yourself to someone else disregards these factors, leading to unrealistic expectations and unnecessary pressure.

Everyone Has a Different Journey
Life is not a one-size-fits-all journey. What works for one person may only work for one person. Comparing your progress to someone else’s can cause frustration when you achieve different results. Recognizing that success takes various forms and manifests differently for each individual is essential.

It Undermines Self-Confidence
Constantly measuring yourself against others can erode your self-confidence. When you consistently feel like you’re falling short, it can lead to a negative self-image and a lack of belief in your abilities. This, in turn, can hold you back from reaching your full potential.

Success Is Subjective
Success is a subjective concept. What one person defines as success may align differently with your values and goals. To find fulfillment and happiness, you must measure success according to your terms, not someone else’s.

Jealousy and Resentment
Comparing yourself to others often breeds jealousy and resentment. These negative emotions can harm your personal and professional relationships, hindering your overall well-being.

Why Compare Yourself to You?

Now that we’ve discussed the pitfalls of comparing yourself to others let’s explore the benefits of measuring your progress against your past self.

Personal Growth

When you compare yourself to yourself, you prioritize your personal growth; this means setting goals based on your current abilities and striving to surpass them. This continuous self-improvement leads to a stronger sense of accomplishment and self-worth.

Increased Self-Confidence

Celebrating your progress and accomplishments builds a healthier sense of self-confidence. Recognizing how far you’ve come reinforces your belief in your abilities and encourages you to push your boundaries.

Authentic Success

When you measure success against your past self, you’re more likely to achieve authentic success. You’ll work toward goals that align with your values and aspirations rather than trying to fit someone else’s mold.

Reduced Stress and Anxiety

Comparing yourself to others often leads to stress and anxiety, as you must constantly keep up or outdo someone else. Focusing on your journey reduces this unnecessary pressure, leading to a more relaxed and fulfilling life.

Long-term Satisfaction

The satisfaction derived from personal growth and achieving your goals is more enduring than any fleeting comparison-based success. You’ll find lasting contentment in knowing you’ve stayed true to yourself and continuously improved over time.

Five Tips to Stop Comparing and Start Focusing on Yourself

  1. Set Personal Goals: Establish clear, achievable goals that reflect your values and aspirations. Measure your progress against these objectives rather than external benchmarks.
  2. Keep a Journal: Regularly journaling your experiences, achievements, and challenges can provide valuable insights into your growth journey.
  3. Limit Social Media: Reduce the time spent on social media platforms that promote comparison culture. Unfollow accounts that trigger negative emotions or unrealistic expectations.
  4. Seek Mentorship, Not Comparison: Embrace mentorship and seek guidance from those you admire. Learn from their experiences, but remember that your journey will be unique.
  5. Practice Gratitude: Cultivate gratitude for your accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem. Celebrate your wins, and use them as stepping stones toward your future goals.

In a world filled with external influences and the temptation to compare ourselves to others, it’s crucial to remember that your journey is unique and meaningful. While mentors and role models can inspire and guide you, your true path to success lies in comparing yourself to yourself.

Just like practicing gratitude can lead to a happier life, if you start comparing yourself to yourself, you’ll find greater fulfillment and realize your full potential by focusing on personal growth, boosting self-confidence, and celebrating your authentic achievements. So, take a step back, shift your perspective, and embrace the power of comparing yourself to yourself.

Love, Jim